Thank goodness that we did not have social media when I was growing up because I think I would have been seriously in need of psychological assistance had I seen photos and videos of all of the parties and things that I was not invited to. Luckily, I'm a little stronger than I was as a teen but betrayal still hurts at any age.
Here is what happened....
I've been in a private facebook chat with a bunch of my high school girlfriends for years. It is so funny and has been great to reconnect with old friends. We've met up a few times for drinks but "speak" so much more often online. There is something so comforting about old friends. Despite all of the things we have gone through since high school, when I look at them, they are still my same fun buddies that I used to giggle with about boys, call for advice and cry to about teenage drama.
The group seemed to be getting along great until I opened my Facebook feed yesterday and saw everyone in photos with the hashtag #friendssincemiddleschool and the caption "Celebrating the first of our 50th birthdays". The location in the photos was Disney World. Yes, 5 of the 7 girls in the group chat were whooping it up at the happiest place on earth and posting about it, yet forgot to include everyone. Another girl in the chat group and I were not invited.
I was stunned. This was obviously not a spur of the moment meet up for coffee. In fact, one of the girls in the chat had asked for photos of the birthday girl a few weeks ago but did not mention it was for a secret party. I immediately felt like I did in middle school when I was left out of something. I remembered crying on my bed about something (I can't remember what exactly the drama was but I sure do remember the sadness about being excluded). I remember my mom giving me good advice about true friends and the like while brushing my hair out of my face and wiping my tears away.
The other girl not included and I instantly starting texting. (Yes, misery does love company). She was just as insulted as I was for not being invited. We tried to think of what to do. Here were our options:
- Leave snarky comments on their posts like "guess our invitations were lost in the mail"
- Text the guests while they were in the happiest place on earth saying "Hey, we are waiting f or you at Cinderella's castle. Where u at?"
- Plan a huge party of our own and invite the entire class of 1985 sans these mean girls.
- Write something in the group chat about being so hurt about being excluded.
In the end, I decided to leave the group chat. I really don't want to have a big fight or drama with these girls. You can never have too many good friends but at least I have a few "ride or die" people in my life. I don't need any bad ones. If there is anything good about being old enough for an AARP card, it's that I know that wasting energy on fake friends is not worth it.
What would you have done? Do you think I should have done something else? I'd love to hear what you have to say.