Approximately twenty years ago I was engaged. I was terribly excited to be marrying the man of my dreams. I was not that excited to be planning a wedding. I had just started my career as a trial attorney and the stress of my heavy case load took precedence over whether I wanted a dove or a heart stamp on the invitation or what color tablecloths I preferred.
In terms of wedding planning, I left almost everything up to my parents. My mother was excited to be planning a wedding. My father was happy to be footing the bill. Maybe not happy but whatever emotion fathers have when their daughters are marrying a great guy and they have to pay for the party. The only thing that I was truly concerned about was my wedding gown.
In the mid 90's many wedding dresses looked like big poofy marshmallows like Mariah Carey did in the 90's. I was having none of this…
I was more inspired by the 1986 wedding of Caroline Kennedy seen here:
The big day came when my Mom and I decided to head out around my hometown to look for a dress. She was teary. I was determined. The very first dress that I tried on was by Vera Wang. It was simple and elegant. Exactly what I wanted. I was done. This was "THE DRESS". Of course, my mother made me go to five other stores and try on a million other dresses that day but we realized that the first one was the dress.
After the big day, my mother used the last of her wedding budget to get the dress preserved by the cleaners. It has since sat in the humongous box in her guest closet taking up almost an entire shelf. Every year or so, she asked if I wanted to take it yet. I explained that I had no room.
My parents are now moving. Their new place has no room for the giant box. My mother demanded that I take it off her hands. I have two sons. I don't think that they will be wearing this dress. Even if I did have a daughter, I am 100% positive that she would want her own over-priced wedding gown. Seriously, if a daughter wears her mother's wedding dress, she is a saint. I must hang out with brats because I do not know one single person who wore their mother's dress for any of their weddings!
So what to do with this beauty? Wedding consignors only want current dresses. Even though mine is Vera Wang, it is 20 years old. I tried to donate it. Organizations that actually give dresses to brides (rather than sell them at their thrift shops) either want dresses less than five years old or demand a donation along withe dress. Shipping was going to cost me at least $50 alone. I really did not want it to cost me money to get rid of this dress.
I considered local charities. I checked out the wedding dresses at my local thrift store. Imagine my horror when I saw these dresses all squished together getting manhandled and look at this one all over the floor! I did not want my lucky dress to suffer this tragic fate. I'm certain some, if not all, of those dresses are going to get so dirty that they will eventually go unsold and thrown away.
What to do? What to do? I had a brillant idea. I asked the drama teacher at my sons' public high school if she could use it for her plays. Of course she wanted it! Now my dress may get used for many faux weddings! It won't get thrown away by Goodwill. It is helping the arts in school! Best of all, it won't be taking up precious closet space any more.
I'm not entirely unsentimental. I did keep the veil. It fits in a shoe box. Perhaps someone will play dress up with it someday!